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Blogroll Inductee

Blogroll Inductee – Wendy Reid and Miss Four Eyes

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The Great XMAS Blogroll Induction Extravaganza – Day 11.

Le Clown screwed up. This never, ever happens. Le Clown is flawless: common fleeting thought when I catch a glimpse of my magnificence™ in the mirror. About the whammy… I scheduled two blogroll inductions on a same day. Why? Because I am flawlessly disorganized, and I will thank the Heavens for the day my new assistant will start her magnanimous/free/generous duties on ACOF. Let’s make this short and sweet—less Le Clown, more about the inductees. Wendy Reid is a fellow Québécois, and has been a loyal Carnie from almost day one. It’s about fucking time she makes the blogroll. Miss Four Eyes used to be on my blogroll, but Le Clown likes to fuck around with people. So I removed her, and insisted she writes a post if she wanted to be back among the lucky ones. Le Clown is flawless at douchebaggery.

WENDY REID

When I first joined the WordPress blogging community back in February of this year I had absolutely no idea what the fuck I was doing.  I eased into it like a horny teenaged boy having sex with his friend’s mom for the first time.  Now that I’m no longer wet (hehehe) behind the ears, I am actually able to put my creative juices to the test when I experiment with designing my blog (I get bored and change it fairly often) and trying to think up new discussions that might peak the interest of one or two new followers.

I’ve blogged about everything from my writing (see my books here) and my death defying life experiences (Parts I, II & III), to my amateur photography hobby and flash fiction pieces.   I’ve met a lot of funny, interesting and kind people through the WordPress blogging community but the most interesting and magnificent ™ has got to be none other than L’Eric or as he’s known worldwide, Le Clown.

When we spotted each other from across the dark, crowded, smoke-filled room, I knew right away that we were meant for each other.

Wendy Reid

As he made his way through the crowd towards me, my pulse quickened and my knees grew weak.  He was even more magnificent ™ in person and I trembled in his awesomeness.

“Bonjour mon amour,” he said as he kissed my hand and tucked his sock monkey back into his pants.

With flushed cheeks and labored breath, I respond.

“Where have you been all my life?  I didn’t think such a magnificent man actually existed and I surrendered to the idea of being alone for the rest of my years.  You have no idea how glad I am to finally meet you.”

My green eyes sparkled with the anticipation of love and magic, but my blood ran cold at le Magnificent’s ™ next sentence.

“Malheureusement ma belle Wendy, ton appetit et energie sexuelle est sûrement trôp pour moi et je suis peur pour ma santé.”

English translation:  “Unfortunately, my beautiful Wendy, your sexual energy and appetite are surely too much for me and I am worried for my health.”

The handsome Le Clown told me that he had a blog here on WordPress and that I should check it out.  I did.  I forget which post was the first one I read but he swore unapologetically and I knew that I would love it here.  I don’t think I’ve missed a post since then.

So…I would never have a steamy romance with his holiness, I would have to settle for masturbating to his one ab photo like the rest of the women who follow his blog.

Pig

Suggested posts:

  1. Scared to Death II – Childhood Incidents;
  2. My horn may be broken, but my finger works just fine;
  3. T.V. Shows I Miss From the 70′s.

MISS FOUR EYES

If you’d said to me last year “Hey how would you like to be a part of Le Clown’s vag fest? You’ll get a badge and everything!” I would have asked you to seek medical help. Me? Be part of a vag fest of a Clown who calls himself, quite pretentiously, Le Clown? You want me to wear a badge for it? Um, no thank you.

Those were simple times. Back when clowns were only part of children’s birthday parties and my nightmares, back when the mention of vagina triggered real blushing, back when I still used to check to make sure my granny panties weren’t hanging out in their nude colored glory. Good old, simple times.

But we live in very different times now. The world has changed. Today, a clown has the legal rights to all sorts of Magnificence™, and at least once a day we all think ‘What would white baby Le Clown do?’.  Anyone who is anyone knows Le Clown (and if they don’t I refuse to speak them, as should you). He took over the entire blogosphere before any of us could ask “What the hell is poutine?” and it is only a matter of time until he takes over the whole world. Will there be anyone to protest? No, I don’t think so.

Today, clowns don’t give me nightmares anymore (much). I let my granny panties hang out in their nude colored glory for all to see. And today all the validation you really need for LIFE is getting on this clown’s blogroll.

Me? Be part of a vag fest of a Clown who calls himself, quite magnificently, Le Clown? Hell YES!

Le Clown, I am honoUred to be part of your blogroll. I want to emoticon you so badly right now, a big fat smiley face that says ‘Fuck Yeah!’ I guess for now I’ll just use this:

Miss Four Eyes

Suggested posts:

  1. Estrogen overload;
  2. They’re selling me Viagra again;
  3. The Sexy Calendar.
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About Le Clown

Founder and CEO of everything I write. Author of A Clown on Fire, Black Box Warnings, and The Outlier Collective. Important guy™.

Discussion

82 Responses to “Blogroll Inductee – Wendy Reid and Miss Four Eyes”

  1. Dear Le Clown of Magnificence™ ,
    Because of all the inductees to your blogroll of fame, I need to take a day off of work every week in order to have time to read all these new people I’m following. Please send me a weekly check to cover my day off of work. I do not take poutine in exchange for money. I would you to also pay me what I’m worth in Canadian money but convert it to American lumps o’cash because I cannot tolerate the word “Loony” – it has a double OO sound combined with an L and an IE sound…bad bad bad…anyway, please get on this ASAP – I will not take “Fuck off” as an answer …. I’m way to tenacious….
    Your loyal carnie,
    Rutabaga…..which is not a turnip, but a Denise

    Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | December 30, 2012, 08:40
    Reply to this comment

  2. C’est une bonée, Le Clown. Elle est superbe.

    Posted by mairedubhtx | December 30, 2012, 09:05
    Reply to this comment

  3. Oh my another one? I’ve lost count of how many carnies have now made it to the illustrious heights of being on Le Clowns blogroll!
    Congratulations Miss Four Eyes, such a shame he turned you down to become his sex slave but at least you can express profanities upon his face on here!

    Posted by scienerf | December 30, 2012, 09:07
    Reply to this comment

  4. Le Clown,
    I’m interested to learn more about this mythical assistant you speak of. As you know I have a half-puppet man as an assistant and I find I do more work rather than less. I would prefer to do less as it is cutting into my precious TV-watching time.
    Speaker7

    Posted by speaker7 | December 30, 2012, 09:10
    Reply to this comment

    • Speaker7,
      Hugo did not tell you?? I guess I’ll have to do it myself January 3……. You’ve been a highlight of my blogging year, Speaker7, thank you….
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | December 30, 2012, 09:11
      Reply to this comment

      • Le Clown,
        Hugo rarely speaks to me. He just stares. I figured this would happen. He’s been muttering “Every day is fucking magical” while he bangs his bald head into the china cabinet. I hope we will still have time to interview your peen. That was to be the highlight of 2013, and then the rest of the year will suck by comparison.
        Speaker7

        Posted by speaker7 | December 30, 2012, 09:19
        Reply to this comment

    • Would it possibly be LESS work if you had a half puppet man – but the opposite half that you have now?

      I think Le Clown has some extra personalities (I hear he’s got one called ‘Le Eric’) so quite possibly, his ‘assistant’ is just sort of freak that’s hiding in his head.

      Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | December 30, 2012, 09:14
      Reply to this comment

  5. I ran to the bus stop hoping to catch you before you left. Too late. You were gone. Tears streamed down my faux clown face-paint leaving rivulets of bare skin that exposed the freckles that were there. Not like you…here or there…you were gone. Sobbing I turned to walk the walk back. Alone. Angry. Yes, angry. I should have arrived earlier to see you off. I should have sent you a note letting you know I was coming. I should have…

    On second thought….You could have left late! You could have written a note and told me when you were leaving! You could have told me you were leaving. Period. You could have…

    I’m over it.

    That was so 2012…

    XXOOXJOTS

    Posted by jotsfromasmallapt | December 30, 2012, 09:43
    Reply to this comment

  6. Hold the presses–there is a photo of LeClown’s abs? How did I miss this? I DEMAND A REPOST!!

    On to the new Inductee(s)™. Nice intros, ladies–you’ve piqued my interest.

    Posted by Addie | December 30, 2012, 10:00
    Reply to this comment

  7. Two excellent additions to Le Blogroll. Congrats Wendy and MissFourEyes, you are both worthy additions to this vag-fest of Magnificent™ Le Clownery™. In honor of your inductions, I shall unfollow you both just so I can follow you again.

    Posted by twindaddy | December 30, 2012, 11:56
    Reply to this comment

  8. Fucking hell, Le Clown, I’m still waiting for you to blogroll your dog – y’know – the one with the ruff round it’s neck. Where the fuck is it anyway?

    Posted by Val | December 30, 2012, 13:08
    Reply to this comment

  9. Wendy and Miss Four Eyes,
    You guys are like an awkward acceptance speech at the Academy Awards: the music turned on, but “the other guy in the back” isn’t done talking yet.

    Cheers to masturbating pigs and nude-colored granny panties!

    Posted by Adam S | December 30, 2012, 13:24
    Reply to this comment

  10. congrats ladies! I mean that sincerely, really I do. I followed both of you as both of you made me laugh. That’s not an easy thing to do for I am way too intense. Ah well, must be because I’m an American living in Canada. That would make anyone intense. hahaha! kidding. kinda, sorta.

    Posted by JackieP | December 30, 2012, 13:46
    Reply to this comment

  11. Kudos ladies! Well deserved and fun acceptance nods.

    Posted by talesfromthemotherland | December 30, 2012, 14:33
    Reply to this comment

  12. Let the vag fest begin! That was excellent ladies. so colorful and lively. I’ve seen you around, but now I will follow you both. Le Clown, oh to be flawlessly disorganized. It all worked out so well for you. This is my new New Year’s resolution.

    Posted by The Bumble Files | December 30, 2012, 15:25
    Reply to this comment

  13. Yay, new blogroll inductees! I follow them both. Yay!

    I’d like to use this line. Please. It’s brilliant.
    “Unfortunately, my beautiful [insert name], your sexual energy and appetite are surely too much for me and I am worried for my health.”

    Posted by Sandee | December 30, 2012, 15:42
    Reply to this comment

  14. I choked on my bubbly soda water with fresh lime slices when I read today’s inductee. No, correct that, inducteeS. I could barely get to the intros in my disbelief: Le Clown has screwed up and the world is askew. Thank goodness we only have 2 days to get over it. A new year wipes out all my memories.
    Wendy, Miss Four Eyes — welcome. You do the blogroll justice. I’m sure you can flex more than just a one ab.

    Posted by iRuniBreathe | December 30, 2012, 15:54
    Reply to this comment

  15. Two crazy hot, sexy, intelligent, talented chicks for the price of one?
    Le Clown certainly knows what the people want, doesn’t he?
    Enjoy the view from the top, ladies….

    Posted by The Hook | December 30, 2012, 16:59
    Reply to this comment

  16. Thank you so much Le Clown for putting me on your blogroll. I am honored. xo Wendy

    Posted by writerwendyreid | December 30, 2012, 18:50
    Reply to this comment

  17. two of my favorite women with whom i have pretended to have sex with. for. on. under. fucked. fuck it. i couldn’t be in more desirable and lustful company. unless i was alone.

    Posted by rich | December 30, 2012, 22:30
    Reply to this comment

  18. Woohoo Le Clown, you blogrolled my internet wifey. We are the hottest glasses wearing internet couple in the webverse. Congratulations wifey – huge huge inapproriate hug .

    Posted by Judith | December 31, 2012, 13:39
    Reply to this comment

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