Everything about Vanessa Chapman is a lie… this is a lie… and this too. Everything she says about us is a lie. Vanessa Chapman does not exist. Vanessa Chapman is not part of my blogroll. The following is not based on actual events. Ask your mom—she was there.
So the conversation went like this…
LE CLOWN: Hey you over there, I’d like to induct you into my magificent blogroll of fabulous magnificense.
ME: Oh no sir, you must have me mistaken for somebody else, this is Vanessa.
LE CLOWN: Yes, I know.
ME: Vanessa Chapman.
LE CLOWN: Yes, I know that.
ME: Did you think I was Vanessa Redgrave?
LE CLOWN: No.
ME: Vanessa Hudgens?
LE CLOWN: No.
ME: Vanessa Williams?
LE CLOWN: No madam, I know exactly who you are, and I want you.
ME: You know I’m British right?
LE CLOWN: Yes, but I want you anyway.
ME: But I am not worthy!
LE CLOWN: Of course not, nobody is worthy, but I have graciously decided to bestow this honor upon a chosen few, of which you are one.
ME: But why me?
LE CLOWN: Because of all the good times we’ve shared together.
ME: What good times?
LE CLOWN: These good times…
ME: Oh right, THOSE good times. Ok, well then I graciously accept your gracious offer, your graciousness. I am eternally grateful. What do I have to do?
LE CLOWN: Just tell the world our story…
So there you have it folks, that’s how I came to be here, sharing this highly sought-after corner of the web with the inimitable, invincible, incredible, Le Clown. Thank you for listening.
Those were some good times–blackmail worthy good times. I hope you’ve kept some photos back for that very reason.
Welcome, Vanessa.
Posted by Addie | December 8, 2012, 07:19Thank you. Oh yes, there are MANY more photos.
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:43Woot.
Posted by Addie | December 8, 2012, 13:41cannot think of anyone that deserves recognition more–she is performing at my virtual Christmas party on December 15th–be there or be square– more details to come but I have heard her song and you do not want to miss it
Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | December 8, 2012, 07:44Hello you! One week till your party, huzzah!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:44with the entertainment it should be a blast!
Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | December 8, 2012, 10:49Looks like good times no doubt
Posted by boomiebol | December 8, 2012, 07:46Yes indeed, such fun times!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:45I’m not sure what to believe, but this post – and those deliciously clever pics – rocked!
Posted by The Hook | December 8, 2012, 07:49Thank you TH. I see you’ve had a little browse around my place, I’ll see you over there later…
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:46Le Clown,
You are wearing the shit out of that cocktail dress. Color me impressed.
Speaker7
Posted by speaker7 | December 8, 2012, 08:24Who knew he could pull off wearing an outfit like that right?
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:47I second that.
Posted by Soul Walker | December 8, 2012, 17:39Busted! the first photo is too fake ( and funny ! ). sorry
Extreme coolness though!
Posted by artisticmilestone | December 8, 2012, 09:25Artistic Milestone,
You are right about the first picture. It does look fake. I am more endowed than that…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | December 8, 2012, 09:50Fake? I’ve no idea what you’re talking about
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:49Congratulations Vanessa – hilarious post!
Posted by Long Life Cats and Dogs | December 8, 2012, 09:33Thank you, I could write a whole book about Le Clown!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:51I’m sure he’d be delighted, or take it for granted, maybe. Either way, he’d notice.
Posted by Long Life Cats and Dogs | December 8, 2012, 16:52LLCD,
Hi ya! Of course I’d notice. And then I’d ask Montreal school to include it as part of mandatory books to read on important Montreal historical figures.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | December 8, 2012, 16:53The stars are now aligned. Vanessa is in her rightful place.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | December 8, 2012, 09:41You always say the sweetest things Carrie!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:52Must be the Sheldon in me.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | December 8, 2012, 11:07Nice.
Posted by Soul Walker | December 8, 2012, 17:40Yes, try as I might, I can’t stifle my Sheldon.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | December 8, 2012, 18:50Congrats, Vanessa. It only goes up from here! Great pics!
Cathy
Posted by Cathy Ulrich | December 8, 2012, 09:41Thank you, although I can’t imagine what a higher place would be than Le Clown’s blogroll!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:53Home is where the heart is…and all that other crap…welcome to your “other” home, Ms. V.
PS. Day job? You have one, right?
Don’t give it up…..
Posted by jotsfromasmallapt | December 8, 2012, 10:25Thank you…I think. It’s nice to be here anyway!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 10:54those pictures are so spooky
Posted by Six Glasses of Water | December 8, 2012, 10:57Haha! They kind of are aren’t they!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 11:45Vanessa, that is a sweet story! Those are lovely pictures. Congrats to your new Le Clown blogroll fame!!
Posted by The Bumble Files | December 8, 2012, 13:04Thank you! And I see you popped over to my blog and commented, so thanks for that too! I wonder when the autograph hunters will arrive at my door…
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 14:09Oh, of course! My pleasure. I do think Le Clown has good taste. That will be our little secret…
Posted by The Bumble Files | December 8, 2012, 14:12Ssshhhh!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 14:16Dry-Hump picture!
Posted by Adam S | December 8, 2012, 14:09I’m not sure if that’s a observation, a request, or an offer!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 14:15Well after I got over my green eyed envy for the blog inductee, I went over and checked it out. Yeah, ok, it’s a really cool blog. When I grow up I want to be just as cool and get inducted in Le Clowns blog roll. Till then , Congrats Vanessa! The pictures though? I’m not sure I wouldn’t burn em, too tempting for blackmail ya know???
Posted by JackieP | December 8, 2012, 15:25Awww, thank you! You know what though, I think Le Clown likes green eyes, so you might be in luck!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 16:48haha! Thanks!
Posted by JackieP | December 8, 2012, 17:32Vanessa Chapman,
Cheers.
-Soul Walker
Posted by Soul Walker | December 8, 2012, 17:41Cheers SW!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 8, 2012, 18:09Le Clown,
Today at work, two people sitting at a table in my section were talking about clowns. And yes, I thought of you. True story, that is!
Marie
Posted by Good Morning, Joe | December 8, 2012, 23:22I find that too, if I hear clown, I think Le Clown!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 9, 2012, 09:59Oh god, I even had a dream last night about an article in a magazine and bunch of blogs I know (including A Clown On Fire) were featured in it. I think I need to take a step away from my computer!
Posted by Good Morning, Joe | December 9, 2012, 10:01Look like college years to me.
Nice sorta meeting you Vanessa, now I should visit your blog.
Posted by Doggy's Style | December 9, 2012, 06:12Looks like college years, but they were all within the last year and I’m 42! Ha! Nice sorta meeting you too.
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 9, 2012, 10:00Wait a minute. She is MY Vanessa. You can’t have her.
Posted by robincoyle | December 9, 2012, 13:59Don’t worry Robin, I’m still yours too!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 10, 2012, 01:43That thing you’re doing to her in Picture #3 is illegal in several states.
Posted by Jen and Tonic | December 9, 2012, 17:01Luckily that was in England, so it’s fine! Phew.
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 10, 2012, 01:45Loving all the photos! I want to see more!
Posted by vyvacious | December 10, 2012, 18:57We would just be spoiling you if we showed you more!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 11, 2012, 02:14But…but…I love to be spoiled!!!
Posted by vyvacious | December 11, 2012, 11:14I think you’ve been spoiled enough for this week!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | December 11, 2012, 14:22