Wait, this isn’t where I parked my blog; how did I end up in Canadia? Maybe I stumbled at just the right angle and age into a wardrobe or video game
Mr. Le Eric must have had some forewarning about Lucas Film being adopted by Mickey Mouse standards (maybe he broke into George Lucas’ bat cave or spaceship). How do I know this? Well, the man-with-the-polka-dot-pants-on-fire HIMSELF writes me an email explaining that he cannot participate in his weekly Sunday post/rapid-fire comment exchange and that maybe I could take over. Just for one week. And pro-bono obviously. And forgo my normal science teaching to save his ass.
The Clown’s reason for this website vacation? It all comes back to Star Wars.
Apparently, when he and Tiny Geek were walking down the street, a creature who called himself Yoda (the green, pointed elf ears gave it away too) claimed that the force was strong with that one.
By “that one,” he could have only meant Tiny Geek, and though it was Halloween, and perhaps the Yoda was a bit too teenage-looking to be the real thing, Le Clown had no choice but to take him seriously.
So, as Le Red-Nosed-Jester explained in his long-winded email, he began training his daughter in the art of the Jedi. She mostly just levitated plates in the air while saying her words with a syntactical freedom that Yoda would be proud of. Le Clown even sent me a picture to prove it, see?
It looks like the lightsaber skills that Le Clown is training with his protégé might make her the next Disney Princess. But, I digress. Lets get to what you all came for, The Haiku!
Here, have some candy.
Keep it stashed between your teeth
and taste the rainbow.
“It’s not radioactive
if you don’t bite down,”
he said, biting down
Eating gamma ray
pixie sticks on Halloween:
Don’t make them angry
Her midnight snack of
“superhero green” Sweet Tarts
gives her super strength
The comic panel
right before she gets so mad,
she “Hulk Smash-es” dad
And now, dear readers, I leave it to you to explain the game of “neon munching” taking place way past Le Clown’s bedtime. As always, count your syllables. And keep it PG-13 (there are children in the picture, and Tiny Geek as well). Unless, of course, you prefer to respond with the mouth of a sailer, in which case limericks are highly encouraged. I’ll catch you in the comments section!
Star Wars sucks cookies
Although I’ve never seen it
It still sucks, you know
I just said cookies
Cause balls has one syllable
I don’t like Star Wars
Posted by Daan van den Bergh | November 18, 2012, 07:08An entire ship
To destroy other planets.
Vader was dumped bad.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 07:23Much anger I sense;
If cookies are bad as balls,
whose cookies you eating?
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 07:27Like not what no see?
What is this I hear from you?
Daan see this he must
Posted by SocietyRed | November 18, 2012, 07:33Bedtime ritual
Brushing teeth with light saber
Don’t use too much force!
Posted by blogless wonder | November 18, 2012, 08:10In a galaxy
where there are no cavities,
there’re no teeth either
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 08:17pitter patter let’s
get at ‘er said the Piped Pi-
per to Darth Vader
(just wanted to participate – no matter how lame)
Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | November 18, 2012, 08:20I’ll play light-saber
In the key of D, and young
Jedis will follow
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 08:25see now that just makes
mine seem so so much lamer
where did the Jedis go
Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | November 18, 2012, 08:31My young Padawan
haiku are like the dark side
The Jedi are dead
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 08:40my sorrow is too
great to keep on keeping on
my sword I fall on
Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | November 18, 2012, 08:43Midnight snacking on sugary Super-heros
Is no treat to any sleepy parent warrior.
I have no idea about my syllable count
But I do know all about paying the dentist’s account.
Posted by asklotta | November 18, 2012, 09:20It like pulling teeth
when you’re replacing pulled teeth
with children’s dentures
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 10:08I don’t like Star Wars
I am un-American
In this strange dislike
Posted by Carrie Rubin | November 18, 2012, 09:39Meat and potatoes
also so American
strange that I don’t starve.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 10:11Busy day you have
Responding all day you’ll be
Last week here was I
Yoda speak haiku
So Star Wars is apt theme
Great pic to inspire
Le Clown is Jedi
Bite sized light saber indeed
poor kid, run screaming!
Posted by thecheekydiva | November 18, 2012, 09:46Perhaps they’re giants
flossing with green swords after
snacking on Jedi
In Dagoba swamp
they have def poetry jams
Le Clown is sith judge
Last week how’s you cope?
I’m think zombie juice smoothies
will get me through it
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 10:06drug laptop around
I was chained to comment stream
mind fried by days end
Le Clown chooses well
And may the force be with you
you are up to task
Posted by thecheekydiva | November 18, 2012, 10:21Le Clown is so wise
Too old to begin training,
but he let me haiku.
I know the last line
had too many syllables
Time to break some rules.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 10:32Rules are for breaking
Just don’t let it go too far
stay on the Light Side
Posted by thecheekydiva | November 18, 2012, 11:42Consider me blessed
Not living in Canada
I have sunlight in winter.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:49la fille et le papa
grignoter les ténèbres
sabre laser briller sur
Posted by Gunnu PS | November 18, 2012, 10:51I do not speak French
well enough to respondez,
but I’ll say d’accord.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:24okay
Posted by Gunnu PS | November 19, 2012, 14:02Green Lantern, a twat
But Le Clown and Tiny Geek
Real superheroes
Posted by Le Clown | November 18, 2012, 10:53Spandex is for dorks.
World-saving comic-book knights
Fight crime with bed sheets.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:27Truth, unbidden hails
So the day is saved for us
Real heros speak french.
Posted by Soul Walker | November 18, 2012, 11:30Trees are magic. Real
Heroes drink maple syrup
to grant their powers
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:33Let the force
be in the mouth
the better to laser you with
Posted by isawbobdylaninaspeedo | November 18, 2012, 11:14Turn to the dark side
We’ll have no milk chocolate here
Bittersweet’s better
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:21Bitter is always better
she said with chocolate
dripping and on her fingertips
Posted by isawbobdylaninaspeedo | November 18, 2012, 12:01If I did not have
to climb like spiderman now
I’d help clean her mess
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 12:08Chocolate is my kryptonite!
Screamed the villain
Tiny Geek ruins with one sweep
Posted by isawbobdylaninaspeedo | November 18, 2012, 12:15Evil masterminds
are afraid of Halloween
candy season death
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 16:02There once was a jedi from home
Who sat sweetly singing with foam
A saber in tub
Is good for a rub
At the threat of dismemberment shown.
Posted by Soul Walker | November 18, 2012, 11:36Off to rock climbing,
you have a much better name;
Skywalker is lame.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:59Light stick aglow with
wonder. Tiny Geek, Le Clown
Green. Vader Beware…
Posted by Cathy Ulrich | November 18, 2012, 11:47Red swords are evil
Blue swords are blue. Green Saber?
Le Clown’ll eat you.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 11:52Yoda’s friend Kermit
Said not easy being green
Puppets speak the truth
Posted by blogless wonder | November 18, 2012, 12:21Puppets also say
That numbers sponsor their show
Maybe they’re on drugs
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 16:05Think of puppet’s life-
Hand up bottom all day long.
I’d be on drugs, too.
Posted by blogless wonder | November 18, 2012, 18:16Tarts are super strength
But don’t forget ‘lil gummies
Worms, shrooms, octopus
Posted by The Bumble Files | November 18, 2012, 13:14Gummies are great but
Jedi are strictly vegans
The Sith eat wrigglies
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 16:08Never seen Star Wars
Visit other galaxy?
‘Nuff trouble in mine
Posted by Storkhunter | November 18, 2012, 13:21Perhaps doctor who?
Traveling through space and time?
Wibbly wobbly?
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 16:08Green goblins grimace
Tiny Geek takes after dad
Jedi in training
Posted by SocietyRed | November 18, 2012, 15:16Tiny has chapped lips
She is using light saber
as sci-fi chapstick
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 16:10Haiku you make good
With waning material
Still coming on strong
Posted by SocietyRed | November 18, 2012, 17:19I trained in Japan
with weights tied to my ankles
I’d recite haiku
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 17:48Now a fan am I
You’re walking on rice paper
I now follow Cain
Posted by SocietyRed | November 18, 2012, 19:23SocietyRed,
I’m so allergic to rice
I tread carefully
Thanks for the appreciations. They are appreciated.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 20:10Looks a lot like Ooze
Reminiscent of Turtles
Those Teenage Ninjas
Posted by Adam S | November 18, 2012, 21:59Radioactive snack
I want to play Raphael
and order pizza
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 18, 2012, 22:13Cowabunga Dude
Pie without the anchovies
That’s Turtle Power
Posted by Adam S | November 18, 2012, 22:16Watch out for splinter
He slips salty fish in pie
That’s why turtles fight.
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 19, 2012, 18:08Teach, Master Yoda
Radioactive, I am
The Force is strong here.
Posted by Lyssapants | November 19, 2012, 15:35The force=ma
physics humor for the nerds
I’ll be here all week
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 19, 2012, 18:02Crack to light they say
But can I use my mouth to?
One way to find out!
Posted by becca3416 | November 19, 2012, 16:17Chipped teeth on the floor
The tooth fairy will be pleased
A least my mouth glows
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 19, 2012, 18:01I have absolutely no poetic bones in my Canadian body – no jokes about any of my bones, please! But this post rocked hard!
Posted by The Hook | November 19, 2012, 16:18Your skeleton stands
Just as well without poetry
No bones about it
Posted by Anansi the Poet | November 19, 2012, 18:13Better than never
Late is. Green with envy am
I too late to join
Posted by Human In Recovery | November 21, 2012, 01:29