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From the Book of Le Clown...
Clowning

Ginger Snaap and the Hodgepodge Monster

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This is not a story by Tim Burton. Once upon a time there lived a magnificent creature by the name of Hodgepodge the Post. Hodgepodge was in love with the beautiful maiden Ginger Snaap, who was also known as the only resident of Edward Hotspur‘s land of Blah.

Page six. On a cloudy and cold Thursday morning, Ginger Snaap left her dwelling to visit the wonderful kingdom of Le Clown. She followed the ecstatic cheering sound of a very large crowd, until she found herself as a guest blogger on Black Box Warnings. Read her post: One Pea In A Disordered Pod. Don’t make Hodgepodge hunt you down. End of story.

Page 13: After using his brain flesh real hard, Le Clown had decided to drop out of Canadica. He was working on a photo blog for his friend Sweet Mother, when one of his models pulled a Le Clown and dropped out of the photoshoot. Damocles pulled a fast one on Le Clown, dropped the weight of his sword on the flesh of his brain, and the photo blog exhaled its final breath. To quote the great David Byrne: You may ask yourself, why did Le Clown drop out of Canadica? Well… That’s a whole new story.

Page 21: Le Clown’s blog was enjoyed by a very large readership – it was now translated into more languages than the Bible, including the language of Honey Boo Boo, Muslim, Hindu and Instagram (aka Hipster Douchebagnism). Le Clown was also working on two new blogging projects. One of these projects was a collective effort between the Ringmistress, Madame Weebles, Roller Giraffe and Jen Tonic. For the time being, let’s pretend this readership was satisfied with that information. The other project was a new weekly feature, which was soon going to appear on both A Clown on Fire and Fear No Weebles. And they lived happily ever after.

Epilogue – A Word from the Author: Thank you everyone: my readers, my Carnies, my Hecklers, my fellow bloggers and random visitors, for blowing my mind – and stats – with your friendship. A month ago, I was strolling around the neighbourhood with my daughter. A car slowed down, and a woman yelled through the window: “Hey, you wouldn’t be Le Clown now, would you”? I never had the chance to answer her [you, if you're reading this]. To be recognized on the street, in my every day life, even when I was not wearing clown make-up. Now THAT’s fucked up… Nah… That was pretty cool. Stay tuned for the movie adaptation directed by [Darren Aronofsky/Wes Anderson/Michel Gondry].

It’s been said that Ginger Snaap and the Hodgepodge Monster will sell more copies if we add a picture to the book. Here’s a freshly squeezed one of Le Clown, sporting his new hairdo, channelling Instagram and his hipster douchebagness. Speak soon.

Le Clown does Instagram

Le Clown does Instagram better than Instagram itself.

Now head over here to read Ginger Snaap’s post on my other blog, Black Box Warnings.

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About Le Clown

Founder and CEO of everything I write. Author of A Clown on Fire, Black Box Warnings, and The Outlier Collective. Important guy™.

Discussion

100 Responses to “Ginger Snaap and the Hodgepodge Monster”

  1. Nice story…and I like the pic, Le Clown. Very unclown-like… :)

    Posted by kayjai | September 27, 2012, 07:11
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  2. I snorted out loud when I read that. That’s a good thing.

    Posted by GingerSnaap | September 27, 2012, 07:16
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  3. Is this in the Honey Boo Boo translation? Because me don’t understand this like a pig anus.

    Posted by speaker7 | September 27, 2012, 07:36
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  4. And perhaps we need a kinder, more gentile photo for the book? Just a friendly suggestion.

    Posted by GingerSnaap | September 27, 2012, 07:36
    Reply to this comment

  5. Truly Hodgepodge…I guess we’ll have to wait and see what’s on the horizon. Sounds interesting.

    Posted by Cathy Ulrich | September 27, 2012, 08:11
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  6. Liking the hairdo…Le Clown is channeling his inner Victoria Beckham.

    Posted by boomiebol | September 27, 2012, 08:17
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  7. You appear to be smizing in this photo. Please tell me that you’re going to try out for Canada’s Next Top Model. Please say it’s true.

    Posted by The Waiting | September 27, 2012, 08:21
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  8. To make that a perfect Instagram shot you are only missing the fish lips.
    When I had my other blog I lived in fear of people recognizing me, I used to write some wicked stuff, got some life threatening emails and comments. You are in the cool side.

    Posted by Doggy's Style | September 27, 2012, 08:27
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    • Leo,
      Is that blog still up? I’d love to read some of it. My wife (Laments and Lullabies) and myself have been comfortable about sharing our real selves on the interwebs. We do have our question marks when it comes to the kids, but our image I’d say is part of the “brand”.

      Here’s my hodgepodge story about dogs. As a kid, we had cats and dogs. We had a toy poodle called Chico. One night, we’re outside with my brother and his friends – he’s 5 years younger, and at that time, around 11. His friend is on a skateboard, beside Chico, when he falls on Chico, and kills him on impact. The poor dog. But. The poor kid. The remorse, and guilt. Anyway. Voilà.
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 08:31
      Reply to this comment

      • Poor Chico and the boy, the trauma.

        My previous blog was called 21waysto, the name came from the fact that experts believe that you can develop a habit in 21 days. However, the blog had nothing do with habits but ways to do certain things. It was written with humor, really dark sense of humor which is the one I prefer, sarcastic and satiric and rather gruesome. I never got censored because I owned the domain and was self hosted. The most popular series of posts was the “21 ways to kill your rich husband with plants grown in your garden” and after that came “21 ways to cook the rich husband you killed”. I deleted it 6 months ago after 1 year without posting. Then I decided to start blogging again, used Doggy as an excuse, I pick the name of the blog cuz I knew we cannot hide out true-selves and sooner or later I was going to start doing “personal” blogging again, of courseI’ll keep this one more family oriented or that I think.
        I always kept my location secret, my identity was there, with Doggy’s Style I’m more flexible (I giggled), I’m liking this other side of blogging, the dark side was fun, bunch of crazy people, I had a blast.

        Posted by Doggy's Style | September 27, 2012, 09:37
        Reply to this comment

  9. diggin the doo Le Clown.. you work it well. Can’t wait to read what you are cooking up

    Posted by unfetteredbs | September 27, 2012, 08:45
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  10. Hey … Le Clown is really Al Pacino!

    Posted by aFrankAngle | September 27, 2012, 08:59
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  11. Every time you mention me it’s like le petit mort.

    Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 27, 2012, 09:20
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  12. …using brain flesh really hard… EXcellent!

    Posted by kzackuslheureux | September 27, 2012, 09:45
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  13. You’re so pretty.

    Posted by julesagray | September 27, 2012, 09:46
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  14. Cool hairdo, Le Clown. I’m so confused but I guess I’ll have to wait for more info. So, you won’t be on Canadica? I’m so confused.

    Posted by Brigitte | September 27, 2012, 09:58
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  15. Are you divorcing us? I’m so confused.

    Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 27, 2012, 10:06
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  16. It’s like Le Clown-gone-acoustic. Love the pic.

    Posted by daddyranman | September 27, 2012, 10:11
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  17. Nice hair, I was so taken by the lovely locks that everything else became background noise. You rock the faux hawk.

    Posted by draconianstylist | September 27, 2012, 10:28
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  18. It’s not everyone who can exude Big Top charm while going about their daily routine. I’m surprised you aren’t recognized more often.

    Posted by LaVagabonde | September 27, 2012, 10:31
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  19. I’m so confused…did you call yourself a douchebag??

    Also, I have a nouvelle idea for the “find us on facebook” button: f us
    It’s short and catchy!

    Posted by theabrasiveembrace | September 27, 2012, 11:13
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  20. I’ve been reading some of the translations of A Clown on Fire in other languages. The Honey Boo Boo version, alas, was incomprehensible.

    Posted by Madame Weebles | September 27, 2012, 11:33
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  21. You look familiar.
    That’s weird.

    Posted by No Blog Intended | September 27, 2012, 12:38
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  22. i was wondering what happened to your canadica post. shall we skip you this week? cause i thought you said monday, but when you have ‘model problems’ you have, ‘model problems’. lol. let me know what you’d like to do, good sir. xo, sm

    Posted by sweetmother | September 27, 2012, 12:46
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    • Sweet Mother,
      I thought I had written you. I won’t be able to post. I had a great photo blog planned, but two of the models I had for the photoshoot backed out because of the “subject” at the last minute… I’d still like to write that post, but it will not be possible to produce that wonderful piece of cynism this week. Alas.
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 12:48
      Reply to this comment

  23. I’m trying to figure out how you actually get any work done for a living. You have your fingers in so many poutine pies. Maybe you need to self host your blog so you can start getting some advertising money for all your efforts. Pretty cool you got recognized in the street.

    Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 27, 2012, 12:51
    Reply to this comment

    • Carrie,
      I work as a web and social media consultant, which means I am almost, exclusively, all day in front of the computer. It helps. And I make my own schedule, which also helps. One day, though, that will change, and I’m seeing this coming soon…. Which is also why I am choosing projects at this point… I myself am starting to feel the weight of it all, as much as I am enjoying all of it.
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 12:59
      Reply to this comment

  24. As I started reading this, at first I thought you had conjured up another Mad Lib contest :) Dude, how cool is that? You are famous! I hope you remember all of us little peons when you make it all the way to the top and save us seats at the award show.

    Posted by dockfam | September 27, 2012, 13:01
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  25. I don’t know what language this post is in, but I didn’t understand a fucking word. Or maybe it’s cause I’m sick. Blah.

    Posted by writerwendyreid | September 27, 2012, 13:06
    Reply to this comment

  26. Carrie took the words out of my mouth. You, my friend, are one busy dude. Can you spread a little Le Clown juice around to the rest of us?

    Posted by Jen and Tonic | September 27, 2012, 13:55
    Reply to this comment

    • Jen,
      It’s a question of priority: Sara, blog, tv, kids. Kidding. But yes, it’s been my life, I can’t just be satisfied with one project, as I get bored. On the other hand, I start a gamut of other ones that I leave unfinished. Which is why at this point I need to focus on the ones I really want to follow through with. The project with Weebles will not be extra work, so that in itself is fun to look forward to. The other one you’re involved with, well, it will be a group effort. And if it gets bigger, as I am hoping it will, there will room to expand, on a human resource level… What a serious answer from Le Clown…
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 14:12
      Reply to this comment

  27. I have to admit, I’m disappointed in this. I read the word ‘hodgepodge’ and assumed (and naturally so) that I would be viewing a wonderful recipe for a stew that incorporates leftovers and random things found along the highway.

    Posted by calahan | September 27, 2012, 13:55
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  28. To be recognized by someone not sporting a badge and a warrant- it must be sweet.

    Posted by Toulouse | September 27, 2012, 14:16
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  29. Rockin’ a new do. It suits you. I like it.
    You are nothing if not a marketing genius. You’ve got a great combination of intelligence, creativity, sensitivity and the ability to market the hell out of something, and now you have a cool hairdo. Will you stop at nothing? I guess the rest of us will sit on the sidelines and be amazed as you do your thing.

    Posted by A Gripping Life | September 27, 2012, 14:17
    Reply to this comment

  30. So many cool things here today. I’m sure your instagram will be in my dreams tonight. The look appears to be right on the edge – it could fall over onto a sweet L’Eric dream, or backward onto a Le Clown nightmare. We shall see. Congratulations on all of your success.

    Posted by Maddie Cochere | September 27, 2012, 15:35
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  31. I discovered Edward Hotspur about a half hour ago via the Blog Idol contest. How about that timing! Our universes collided.

    Posted by robincoyle | September 27, 2012, 16:57
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  32. Le Clown,
    I’m not at all surprised you were spotted on the street. You are so loved. Keep up the great work. I look forward to more of your creative projects.
    TBF

    Posted by The Bumble Files | September 27, 2012, 20:22
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  33. Wow, this post was improved dramatically by the addition of that Edward Hotspur, he said as though he hadn’t already commented here.

    Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 27, 2012, 21:51
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    • Eddie,
      I have to agree. Adding Edward Hotspur was like a Bergman movie, The Hour of the Wolf, perhaps. It conveyed a sense of loneliness, and sadness to Hotpur’s BLAH land. Dramatic, as you said.
      Le Clown

      Posted by Le Clown | September 28, 2012, 07:11
      Reply to this comment

      • This is an inaccurate comparison, unless you are referring to the main character, Borg. In that case, I agree – resistance to my greatness is futile.

        In the future, please spell out acronyms once before using them. BLAH = Blessed Land of Awesome Hotspur. Carry on.

        Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 28, 2012, 09:25
        Reply to this comment

  34. I’m shocked that you were recognized on the street. I didn’t think you left your computer since returning from Nova Scotia. It probably helps that you and your spawn were both wearing red clown noses.

    Posted by lameadventures | September 27, 2012, 22:28
    Reply to this comment

  35. Darrin Aronofsky, Wes Anderson, and Michel Gondry are going to direct the movie adaptation? How’d you finagle that?

    Posted by Angel Fractured | September 28, 2012, 00:04
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