“The blogosphere has no business in the bedrooms of Le Clown”.
- Pierre Elliot Trudeau
You might have read this. Or this. And even this. But Le Clown doesn’t write about sex. Le Clown rocks out with his pork sword tucked away. Dick won’t be slappin’ your pretty faces with his bedroom stories. No meatstick to chew on A Clown on Fire. Le Clown’s skin flute doesn’t play that melody. Only Groucho Marx-like spitstick jokes on this blog. All pink cigar smoke and mirrors. Microphallicaly disappointing, isn’t it?
A holographic Le Clown holding an enlarged blue ball.
You wouldn’t know this if you would look at the popular search terms used to find this blog:
- Ron Jeremy
- Ron Jeremy young
- Ron Jeremy sex with a clown
- Masturbating clowns
- Rainbow unicorn sex
- Naked white clown full frontal big cock
Carving pumpkins is a messy thing.
Don’t get Le Clown wrong, he’s no prude. Le Clown enjoys the talented sex bloggers of WordPress - The Story of Alice just to name one – but when it comes to writing about his sex life, Le Clown usually keeps his pencil dick between his third leg.
Each morning, The Ringmistress helps Le Clown to put on his clown costume. She is all love.
Brian Westbye once told Le Clown: “There’s a latent homoeroticism on A Clown on Fire“. Le Clown remembers being offended by his comment… Why latent? Le Clown is down with the gays. People from all denominations are accepted on his blog, even Americans.
Le Clown can take it all in; not even the horizon is too big.
Le Clown doesn’t want to be a prick and pound you silly with a very long moralistic piece on sex – if you want to bare it all on your blog, it’s your prerogative. Le Clown prefers being up frontal about his stance on dingaling it publicly, and as shlong as you respect this, we’ll continue to hang it out together.
Maggie: “Le Clown is a gifted and bizarre socialist, sock monkey breast feeding Canuck”. Le Clown is indeed, a tree lovin’ hugger.
********************
Post-Scrotum: In my quest to get Freshly Pressed, I submitted this post to a stiff checklist.
| Freshly Pressed Tips | Highlights of this Post | Rating |
| Write unique content that’s free of bad stuff |
Not once did Le Clown use bad stuff. |
★★★★★ |
| Have a point of view | There’s no Zuul, only Le Clown. | ★★★★★ |
| Don’t be afraid of your voice |
With my Le Clown’s voice I will charm WordPress’ scouts, I will charm the Lord of the Dead, Moving their hearts with my melody. I will bear WordPress away from Hades, And merit my Freshly Pressed badge. Virgil – The Story of Le Clown and WordPress |
★★★★★ |
| Paint us a picture | How about five? | ★★★★★ |
| Make it easy on the eyes |
“Don’t hate me cause I’m beautiful” - Le Clown in his now infamous Pantene shampoo commercials. |
★★★★★ |
| Add relevant tags | Clown sex, Ron Jeremy, Pink cigar. Need Le Clown say more? |
★★★★★ |
| Write headlines we can’t ignore |
Unless you’re a 12-yr old girl, you can’t really ignore Woody Allen. |
★★★★★ |
| Aim for typo-free content | Le Clown relied on WordPress’ AutoCorrect. It MUST be flawless. |
★★★★★ |
Here I am again.. the lame first reader/commentor. too bad I don’t sleep in eh? Your tags are pretty racey fresh….
Flirty is oh so much better than sex posts eh?.. smirk. You are the master of lead ins with your titles..
Posted by unfetteredbs | September 24, 2012, 06:57Audra,
I have a feeling my tags will stick on WordPress’ Reader as sticky-gooey stuff sticks on sheet. They are hard to wash off.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:04smart man
Posted by unfetteredbs | September 24, 2012, 09:22I love you.
That aside, ‘Dick won’t be slappin’ your pretty faces with his bedroom stories’ ? This sounds so juicy I actually regret not seeing it.
ps. That pumpkin photo. My goodness…
Posted by workspousestory | September 24, 2012, 07:04India,
You know what? I think WordPress might have removed my post from Reader… I can’t be sure, but it’s not there, and if I use any of the tags I have used, I can’t see my post. I usually have good traffic from WordPress, and not one hit from it so far… And I have read much steamier post than this one…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:28There was a search term in my stats lately which said ‘Photos of Vanessa Chapman in panties’. Well they were surely disappointed if they came to my blog expecting pictures like that! It did leave me curious though as to whether it was me they wanted to see in panties or another Vanessa Chapman, and if it is another Vanessa Chapman, then what has she got that I haven’t that they should want to see her in panties and not me?!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | September 24, 2012, 07:06Vanessa,
Well, now that you have published a few articles, and are an internet sensation, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that you’re getting hits from your perverted fanbase, now, right? Unless they meant Tracy Chapman in undies, which seems very unlikely to me…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:30Really should not have read this at work in a quiet office. The effort required not to let out a big snort of laughter was immense!
Posted by Blue Girl | September 24, 2012, 07:07Blue Girl,
I don’t even read myself at work, and I work from home…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:30Now that comment was inspired, I was trying to may a roll up but nearly spat the filter out
Posted by Bruce Ruston | September 24, 2012, 12:05I realize this post is about the absence of genitals, but you’ve reminded me of this tree at the end of my driveway. Total vagina. Once it’s light outside, and maybe above 50 degrees, I’ll go get a pic of it.
Posted by Tallulah "Lulu" Stark | September 24, 2012, 07:19Lulu,
I think many tress have cork vaginas. And cork vaginas should also be loved, without discrimination. Free love, (wo)man. Free love for all.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:31Very visible from the bark. Again, I’ll get you a pic if you hassle me about it.
Posted by Tallulah "Lulu" Stark | September 24, 2012, 10:08Lulu,
This is me bugging you about it….
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:11I am so relieved Le Clown that you’re not going to get all “Dingly Dangly Scarecrow” on us. You crack me up though with or without the lewdity, rudity, nudity or crudity! Jen
Posted by jiltaroo | September 24, 2012, 08:20Jen,
I have tremendous respect for bloggers who can bare it all, some do it also very eloquently. My sex life, and my private life with my wife is off-limit. It’s simply a comfort thing… I am happy the message came through…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:32I agree. It’s not who you are. It just wouldn’t “fit” Le Clown. Jen
Posted by jiltaroo | September 24, 2012, 09:50You’re welcome!
Posted by Brian Westbye | September 24, 2012, 08:53Brian,
Cum again?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:34If the vagina tree doesn’t get you freshly pressed – I don’t know what will…
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 09:06Rutabaga,
Well…. if anything…. I think the tree vagina has got me removed from Reader… I cannot see my post…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:36Nope- it’s there….
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 09:50Dear me, Le Clown you are insane, hysterical and I believe you may have some issues with boundaries. No matter! You delight and pique the interest of your readers not to mention coming up with all kinds of new words to describe genitalia. You seemed to have ticked all the FP boxes but I wouldn’t hold my breath (or anything else) thinking this one may be FP’d. It strays from the guidelines of not having any dirty bird stuff in it. And thank you for being accepting and tolerant of Americans. Canadians, as you know are always welcome at the Banter, with or without their poutine, shreddies or two-fours.
Posted by Brigitte | September 24, 2012, 09:48Brigitte,
Yes, it is important to have boundaries. What happens in our bedroom should stay there. I know I am just paraphrasing our late prime minister Trudeau, but words of wisdom. Now this being a very eloquent post, you don’t think I will get Freshly Pressed with this one? I mean, I channelled Anais Nin and Henry Miller for this one. If only they were written by Charlie Kaufman…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:52stimulating….not sure how I will stay focused on my work today.
Posted by misslisted | September 24, 2012, 09:54Miss Listed,
I suggest a short session of mental exercises. For starters, think about Rush Limbaugh. There. Don’t you feel better now?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 09:59wow, that was instantaneous. all of the desire and longing created by the picture of you and the vagina tree drained from my body in a quick flash,
Posted by misslisted | September 24, 2012, 10:02Happy Monday! Those images will burn in my brain all day (well, at least for the next hour). The tags are certainly appropriate for your content and then some. Good luck with FP, LeClown…but I suspect sadly, “that today will not be the day.” Again…
Posted by Cathy Ulrich | September 24, 2012, 10:07Cathy,
What about the images? It is Le Clown in unison with nature… As for FP’d, I think you might be on to something, my dear friend…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:08Yes, the nature thing, that’s it.
Posted by Cathy Ulrich | September 24, 2012, 10:27Penis.
Posted by Madame Weebles | September 24, 2012, 10:12Madame Weebles,
It’s another way of calling the male member. I have been quite in awe of the word PEEN myself, though, lately.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:13I like “magic arrow”
Posted by free penny press | September 24, 2012, 18:05Lynne,
Speaking of Magic Something… How disappointing was that flick… I mean, I was ready for some peen action, and all I got was a close-up of a prosthetic membrum virile. Sad, really.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 18:14Being a neophyte here, this is a good post for me to realize your talent. Love the “Freshly Pressed” tag.
Posted by aFrankAngle | September 24, 2012, 10:25Frank,
This is a Le Clown post, in its full glory. Yes, you’ve landed on a perfect example of my brand. I do write posts under the L’Éric moniker, which are very different in content and tone – much less incendiary – to use a term that WordPress has used about my posts…
And I’m happy to have you here, my new blogging friend. I hope you have a great week.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:37All monday blues will now be replaced by
horrorsbeautiful images of tree vaginas and Le Clown in a bikini top!
Posted by MissFourEyes | September 24, 2012, 10:37Miss Four Eyes,
Le Clown in a bikini top – > I take offence in that. That is a full fledged bra from American Apparel. Respect.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:38This was the sexiest non-sexual post I’ve read in a schlong time. I love you long time Le Clown. xo
Posted by writerwendyreid | September 24, 2012, 10:47Wendy,
This is also a non comment. And not a thank you for your words.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 10:59This song will get you Fressssshly Smacked, I mean Pressed
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 11:00Denise.
You and I must talk about music. As a very young Le Clown, I did listen to a great deal of them…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 11:04I love Rock-a-billy. LOVE LOVE LOVE it…I love psycho rockabilly the most. I was very sad when Lux died.
Do you ever listen to the Raunch Hands? Please listen – you must… This is one of the BEST ALBUMS EVER
OH and have you ever seen any Elton Motello around? He’s a weird guy and Canadian I think – I have an album of his I love.
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 11:07Denise,
It’s a fun song. I have grown out of that style though. Now I’m all into emotional multi-layers dissonant music. Sounds fun, no?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 11:10I like my music to sound like it came out a garage. I’m not so big on the mult-layers of emotion
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 11:14We are connected in that “Ron Jeremy” is also a popular search term for my blog.
Great post, my friend. Getting to know you and your family is always fun, with or without sex. As schlong as you post witty things (and maybe include penis puns on occasion), I will be here, wishing like fuck that I came up with it.
Posted by La La | September 24, 2012, 11:00La La,
Ron Jeremy is my #1 search term. I think it has a great deal to do with this post, though: http://clownonfire.wordpress.com/2012/04/23/brain-farts/
I will trademark “as shlong™”…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 11:06You absolutely should!
Posted by La La | September 24, 2012, 11:09So THAT is how I get Fresh Pressed. Thanks for the tips. I’m sure to be Fresh Pressed in the year 2072 . . . from the grave.
Posted by robincoyle | September 24, 2012, 11:56Robin,
Yes it is! It is the official guide to the consecration of the WordPress Gods. Use the checklist wisely… And I’m curious, you’ve never been Freshly Pressed? You??
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 11:59Nope. The WordPress Gods have not smiled on me.
Posted by robincoyle | September 24, 2012, 12:03Robin,
Trust me on that. I haven’t been wrong yet. With you, it’s only a question of time.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:05Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I’m not so sure. I am humbled by the number of bloggers out there (you) that know what they are doing.
Posted by robincoyle | September 24, 2012, 12:11Robin,
Likewise… And. I don’t want to steal the punch, but two of our fave bloggers were just FP’d today… One being my best WP friend…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:12I went to see who they are but don’t recognize any of the bloggers. Who was FP’d today that we know and love?
Posted by robincoyle | September 24, 2012, 12:21Robin,
Soon. Soon.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:22Today?
Posted by robincoyle | September 24, 2012, 12:41Robin,
Yes. I guess there’s a delay before they appear…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:42Post Scrotum….hahahahaha. I think you have a winner here, I mean you covered all the bases. What more could they want? Other than Le Clown.
Posted by Maggie O'C | September 24, 2012, 11:59Maggie,
“What more could they want? Other than Le Clown.”
Exactly. But of course, this post was never going to be FP’d, and nothing better than a friendly taunting banter to greet my friends over at WordPress.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:01Gee really? I thought for sure this was the one. hahahah
Posted by Maggie O'C | September 24, 2012, 12:31Yep. All the elements are there. Freshly Pressed is just around your corner. You’ve had too shlong of a wait as it is. Oh, and to the person who landed on your site searching for “Rainbow unicorn sex,” I want to say thanks for helping me discover there is something weirder than Furries.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 12:33Carrie,
Unicorn sex. Admittedly, I did smile when I saw this. And then I went on a quest to find some examples, months of research, to no avail. But I am not discouraged. I’m sure it’s out there, somewhere.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:35It’s probably in a E. L. James novel.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 12:42Carrie,
“Novel” being used loosely here, right?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:43I don’t know–I feel like, who am I to judge? If this is what people want to read, than kudos for her for tapping it. (And note, my use of the term ‘tapping it’ should fit in nicely with your post.)
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 12:51Carrie,
I appreciate where your coming from with this… You are right, there is a market. Then let me celebrate other great pioneers: The Olsen Twins, The Farrelly Brothers and John Tesh.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 13:02Good point. And don’t forget Honey Boo Boo.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 13:07Carrie,
A dolla’ makes me holla!
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 13:08I saw a clip from that show on a talk show. It showed the mother lifting up her neck fat and revealing a rash that wouldn’t heal because she wasn’t cleaning it well enough. Really? Can you say ‘sad’ and ‘exploitative’?…
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 13:14Carrie,
I didn’t know who Honey Boo Boo was until a few weeks ago when Sincerely, Slapdash wrote me to ask if we had a Canadian equivalent. I think it’s a very sad affair. I feel for that little girl.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 13:18Oh, me too. The producers cover their butts by saying, “She loves being on TV.” She’s six years old! When she’s 20 or 30 or 40, she may feel very different.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | September 24, 2012, 13:21I’m glad you are accepting of Americans. Our unfortunate neighbours south of the border need all the help they can get understanding gay marriage, tree hugging, and poutine. Schlong live Le Clown.
Posted by Change My Body...Change My Life | September 24, 2012, 12:45Change My Body,
Le Clown is magnanimous this way… Pretty magnificent, right? And stop mentioning poutine… Even though you call it heroin, it’s so fucking delicious!!!
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 12:47I will never understand poutine. I always think it’s pooooontang…and, no offence, Canada…it looks like vomit. Please don’t hate me because I’m judgemental.
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 19:50OMG this was just what I needed on this gloomy Monday! I think you should go for the casting of Christian Grey for the new “Shades of” movies….maybe they’ll let you add your own Le Clown dialogue because it’s just thaaaat damn good. One question tho — what in the hell is the Ringmistress holding in that picture??
Posted by dockfam | September 24, 2012, 13:09Jenn,
I’ll let Speaker7 know. Perhaps she will help me land the coveted Christian Grey role. It’d be tough competition, though. Between Le Clown and Woody Allen.
As for what is holding The Ringmistress… It’s a birthday hat, of course! Things we find casually in a home, no?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 13:11It was er….ummm…uh….very…pointy….
Posted by dockfam | September 24, 2012, 14:02I noticed that in all the buttons you have at the end of this demure post, you seem to be missing a crucial one, the one called “Press This”. Why’s that? Were you too distracted by your Magnificent Member? If you added that button and urged your legions of readers to click it, then maybe you finally will win the WP accolade of your dreams and nightmares. Or, maybe WP will revise their playbook to continue to exclude Le Clown. I suggest, “Try it.”
Posted by lameadventures | September 24, 2012, 13:53Lame,
Thank you. I was unaware of the P spot. I have found it, and now I hope readers will play with it until something gets pressed out.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 22:25You are … a clown.
Posted by drawandshoot | September 24, 2012, 14:58Karen.
Says you.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 15:00Sorry,
You are … Le Clown…
Posted by drawandshoot | September 24, 2012, 15:02you may have outdone yourself with this post
Posted by SummerSolsticeGirl | September 24, 2012, 16:14SSG,
Thank you… As far as Le Clown’s shitck goes, I think this one might be hard to beat.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 17:06It’s so weird. . . I found your blog searching “Ron Jeremy masturbating rainbow unicorn sex clowns” because that happens to be the name of my rock band. It’s like we were destined to appall one another.
Posted by speaker7 | September 24, 2012, 17:28Speaker7,
Great band’s name. It’s right up there with Genital A-Tech and Test Icicles.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 17:48That tree has a huge vagina.
Posted by becca3416 | September 24, 2012, 17:37Becca,
You should see it on a rainy day…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 17:38Don’t tease me like that, you aren’t the only tree lovin’ hugger out here.
Posted by becca3416 | September 24, 2012, 17:39Becca,
Let’s save a tree today.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 17:44I’m down.
Posted by becca3416 | September 24, 2012, 17:45What can I possibly add the other zillion fine people have not said said..
Hmmmm, all I can think of next to say is what is your logo?
Posted by free penny press | September 24, 2012, 18:08Lynne,
And may I ask of which logo you are referring to?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 18:17The “peen, magic arrow, etc” needs it’s own logo that way when you write about S-E-X instead of writing the word, insert the logo..
see what you do to my brain, crazy stuff..LOL
Posted by free penny press | September 24, 2012, 18:23Lynne,
Now I get it… I like the way your brain thinks…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 18:25
Posted by free penny press | September 24, 2012, 18:26This one should be pressed for sure! Your post just now showed up in my reader. I had no idea hilarious tags could keep you from my reading list. Maybe I need to adjust my settings to PG-13 or something. No likey.
Posted by RFL | September 24, 2012, 18:47Rachelle,
It’s so good to see you. How are you? I was thinking about you today. Seems like it’s been years… I think this post might have been pressed by some, in ther privacy of their own home, indeed…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 19:06You look awfully familiar to me. Did you ever act in pornos under the character name THE FRENCH TICKLER?
Posted by H.E. ELLIS | September 24, 2012, 18:55H.E. Ellis,
You must have seen me in “The Rubber Band”, which can only be found on bootlegs today…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 19:08I read this post. I just came in my mouth a little.
Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 24, 2012, 19:37Edward,
Best comment of the day.
Now don’t talk so close to me.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 19:45Sorry, I meant to say:
Awwwww yeah….. I want to comment on your Facebook.
Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 24, 2012, 19:58Edward,
Although I could comment on this witty reply, I’d rather let you know that my filter for you is working, and you are now skipping my SPAM inbox.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 20:01Are you hitting on me?
Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 24, 2012, 21:28Edward,
No.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 22:07Of course you’re not.
Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 24, 2012, 22:19Edward,
The only homoeroticism on this blog is between Le Clown and Brian Westbye.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 24, 2012, 22:26This is exactly what I got from your post.
No, that wasn’t some kind of innuendo about penises. Why do you ask?
Posted by Edward Hotspur | September 24, 2012, 22:30You have watched Wendy O Williams in Reform School Girls, right?
My favorite lines (paraphrased – it’s been years since I’ve seen the movie)
Wendy: You wanna play carnival?
Some poor schmuck: Sure.
Wendy: I’ll sit on your face and you guess my weight
Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | September 24, 2012, 19:54This has sex written all over it without really being about sex. Clever once again, Le Clown.
Posted by The Bumble Files | September 24, 2012, 20:40You’re really on top of your game, you rode this one hard. I deeply enjoyed your ability to pound the piece to completion.
Wet Regards,
Trixie Fucks
Posted by tracy fulks | September 24, 2012, 22:29“Ron Jeremy”? “Masturbating clowns”? I’m somewhat disappointed now by my downright-wholesome-in-comparison search terms like “bloody donut” and “stabbed in eyeball with fork.” Le sigh.
Posted by Eva Halloween | September 24, 2012, 23:35That is one satisfied (and smug) looking pumpkin.
Posted by Dinnerversions | September 25, 2012, 00:28Lisa,
Yes. The thing is that the pumpkin didn’t want to leave…
“Can I give you my number? Will you call me?”
“Let’s have breakfast”…
“Can I meet your parents?”….
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 08:43LOL, I love how they misspelled “masturbating”, as if searching for it wasn’t classy enough. I too refrain from making my readers want to poke out their eardrums by banging on (hehe, banging) about my sex life. I will vicariously read the entertaining confessions of others, however
Posted by Cakes and Shakes... | September 25, 2012, 04:14C&S,
Thank you for pointing out the spelling mistake. I should know by now, and it’s a similar spelling in French. I enjoy myself the writing of others when it comes to sex. I prefer keeping my sex life between my wife and I, and our animals.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 08:42Oh God, I thought those were copied and pasted search terms and the spelling error was theirs, sorry, I’m not in the habit of visiting people’s blogs to correct them! I just found it funny that someone might be typing ‘masturbate’ incorrectly into a search engine because their hands were… emmm.. occupied.
Posted by Cakes and Shakes... | September 25, 2012, 10:38C&S,
Oh please, by all means!! This is the only way my English can improve. I do appreciate when my readers bring up that sort of thing. So really, thank you.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 10:40That a’boy you motor-boatin’ blasted pastor!
Posted by kzackuslheureux | September 25, 2012, 10:13Kreta,
You’re definitely rocking with your gholm out!
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 12:48I’m tired of you talking about my swollen, lubricated gholm, Eric. Not only is it not polite, it’s just wrong.
Posted by kzackuslheureux | September 25, 2012, 14:17Kreta,
Who’s that Eric you are referring to?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 14:18Are you gholming with me clown?
Posted by kzackuslheureux | September 25, 2012, 14:19I can read *gay* all over the post!
Posted by Archana | September 25, 2012, 10:40Archana,
What is this “reading” you talk about?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 12:51“Reading between the lines”, love.
:p
Posted by Archana | September 27, 2012, 14:09I only joined this damned blog because of homo-erotic fantasies about clowns. You’ve ruined it for me now. I shall instantly cease to follow you now. How could you do this to me Le Clown?
But then, on the other hand, you like Star Wars and you name IS Eric.
Ok, I’ll stay. But give us more clown smeared in pumpkin. Please.
Posted by kenthinksaloud | September 25, 2012, 12:09Ken,
Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey? You might enjoy.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 12:51Alas, that book reminds me too much of my granny to bear reading it…you know how it is.
Posted by kenthinksaloud | September 25, 2012, 13:54Thanks for the giggle, Le Clown! I’m no prude, but I’m glad when people keep their sex lives to themselves and leave the porn to the professionals and fangirls. I would, however, like to know more about rainbow unicorn sex. That sounds pretty.
Posted by purplemary54 | September 25, 2012, 12:40Mary,
Unicorn sex. It does, doesn’t it? I have a few in my stable, but I have never caught them doing the nasty, yet…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 12:52Well they’d better be doing it, or else we won’t have any baby unicorns!
Posted by purplemary54 | September 26, 2012, 01:28Thank goodness that “even Americans” are welcome here—where else could I go to laugh so… hard?
Posted by Kana Tyler | September 25, 2012, 12:44Kana,
Of course! Le Clown doesn’t discriminate. Americans and other fictitious characters are all welcome on this circus. The more visitors we have, the more popular Le Clown gets.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 25, 2012, 12:54Did you happen to buy that tree dinner first?
Posted by atothewr | September 25, 2012, 21:31Atothewr,
I did, but it insisted to pay for its own food.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 11:36Sir, that was by no means everything I wanted to know. And man, there’s a whole lot I don’t know…
Posted by Smaktakula | September 25, 2012, 23:25Smaktakula,
Everything I know I’ve learned during my stay in jail.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 11:37Le Clown,
If you decide to make love to the tree, please be very very careful. I could see that being quite painful.
Posted by Love & Lunchmeat | September 26, 2012, 16:46L&L,
I make love to trees each day. To have wood is a wonderful thing.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | September 27, 2012, 11:38Le Clown,
Best non-sex post ever, buddy!
The Hook.
Posted by The Hook | May 23, 2013, 11:03