*******THIS CHALLENGE IS CLOSED, AND OUT TO LUNCH*******
You will find the winners of the Blogroll Contest here.
OK. I’m tired and sore and cranky, in other words, I’m awake. I don’t think I can follow the last three acts of hilarity and brilliance on this Blogroll thingamajoo. I mean, I have to, because Le Clown whimpers when I don’t do what he wants, and Le Whining Clown is a greater torture than being The Donald’s stylist. I’m just saying that having me as the last act is akin to getting Jello for dessert. We’re both cheap, wobbly, and will leave you feeling empty.
I say, careful what you whinge for.
Let’s dredge up an old high school/college/prison favourite: Truth or Dare. Here’s the RULES à la COF:
1) Leave a question or a dare in the comments that you want Le Clown to answer or perform*. Limit one question and one dare per person, because god knows that the friggin’ tsunami of Carnies and Hecklers will cause a WordPress server crash. Not to mention, I don’t have the attention span or stamina to read 716 comments.
2) People can vote for the ones they like best by typing “suck it, Le Clown!” or “like” or “razzle vajazzle” (little nod to Tracy there) under their fave suggestions.
3) Top “truth” and top “dare” will appear in a blog post, written and performed by Le Clown. The dare will be on video. That sound will be me laughing until I snot myself in the background.
4) Anyone can play, and give her/his points to the contestant(s) of their choice.
*no full frontal nudity, phone sex, or things that stain…I know, I’m a dick.
One point for each suggestion (max two points). One point for every vote your suggestion gets (rally your troops, people). Top truth and top dare will receive seven points and Le Clown’s toenail clippings. You can donate your points. Points will be added to your total. I might randomly assign points just to fuck with you.
So have at ‘er, and show no merci.
A message from Lame Adventures:
Fellow Le Clowniacs, I’ve put more energy into Saturday’s challenge than in almost every romantic relationship I’ve had over the past ten years. That’s a weasel-way of admitting, “Prepare for disappointment, I’m an expert at giving it.” You guys all rocked and I seriously considered telling Le Clown, “Give everyone that participated 317 more clown noses immediately!” I knew that pushing that brainstorm would be subjecting myself to the wrath of bushy French Canadian eyebrows so I swallowed my gum and selected twelve — three for each animal. You’re all getting awarded four clown noses. To those of you that are not amongst the chosen twelve, consider the bright side — you didn’t have to get naked with me. 4 clown noses to all of you!
Animal Le Clown 1:
Ruby Tuesday: How long before they let me out of solitary?
The Waiting: I feel like camels were really underrepresented at the RNC.
Dockfam: I think the doc used too much botox…..
Animal Le Clown 2:
Tracy Fulks: I wonder what it’s like to be illegitimately aped?
Maggie O’C: It was the best of times, It was the worst of times.
Doggy’s Style: Hon, could you get me the remote?
Animal Le Clown 3:
Boomie Bol: Come back Madame Weebles, it’s so lonely here without you…
Alice At Wonderland: Man, Gary, sorry about your breakup. So does this mean Susan is free?
Miss Four Eyes: Come back down, I don’t smell that bad.
Animal Le Clown 4:
Curmudgeon-at-Large: On good days, I can touch the rocks.
RFL: Stripes gone rogue.
merlinspielen: Okay who put the Viagra in my oats?
Standings (as of Sunday, 11:59PM):
- Canvas of the Minds (Ruby Tuesday): 325 + 100 for completed bonus game! : 429
- A Rich Full Life (RFL): 209 + 35 points for completed bonus game!: 253.
- A Circus at the End of the World (Angel): 168 + 65 for completed bonus game! and this one: 243.
- Alice at Wonderland: 144 + 85 for completed bonus game and this: 232.
- Dockfam Adventures: 163 + 55 for completed bonus game!: 222.
- Tracy Fulks: 205.
- The Waiting (Emily): 204.
- Curmudgeon At Large: 180 + 20 for completed bonus game!: 202.
- Something Fat Happened (Maggie): 198.
- Merlin Spielen: 188.
- The Girl in the Cat Frame Glasses (Jenn): 163 – you owe Brother Jon big time.
- Doggy’s Style: 152.
- Miss Listed: 128.
- Boomie Bol: 120.
- Miss Four Eyes: 117.
- Lyssapants: 62.
- Daddy Ranman: 51.
- No Blog Intended: 47.
- Long Life Cats And Dogs: 36.
- Jiltaroo: 27.
- Dinnerversions: 17.
- Little Miss Obsessive’s Anatomy: 15.
- Bipolarmuse: 15.
- Chaotican: 9.
- Anansi the Poet: 7.
- Gin and Lemonade (LKD): 6.
A message from Le Clown: It’s the last day of the blogroll contest. It’s been an amazing ride, and a fierce competition. Thank you all of playing. Lame Adevntures‘ challenge was a tough one… And you still participated in large numbers… And look at the standings, too! Thank you LA, for being the mistress of the ceremonies, and going above and beyond (this sounds like the speech of a CEO of a very large corporation). For those who haven’t played the BONUS GAMES, there’s still time to earn some MEGA bonus clown noses… Just look at Tracy Fulks and her bonus games here and here… This is your ticket to coming back from behind, or creating a larger gap between you and your competitors.
Here’s the twist: I will open up 3 more spots on my blogroll!! I will give these spots to 3 of the contestants who have played until the very last day! This is my way of thanking you for making this blogroll contest the MEGA UBER success that it is. Good luck!