Something funny happened on the way to Madame Weebles.
The coveted WordPress email that let’s you know you haven’t been Freshly Pressed yet…
It was like a shot of Vitamin B-12, without the prick. Le Clown, inciting a riot… Sweet. I was elated. I walked around my flat, searching for the most strategic place where I could proudly display my You Have Not Been Freshly Pressed Today award. I removed my son’s kindergarten graduation pictures, my wedding pictures, my daughter’s first pictures – it wasn’t right. I threw away my other blogging awards: the Liebster, the Versatile Blogger, and the ABC … I couldn’t find the courage to get rid of my Alan Smithee Blog award. Aesthetically, my You Have Not Been Freshly Pressed Today award didn’t fit anywhere – it didn’t match with the colour palette of my couch; it wasn’t working with the feng shui of the bedroom. I sat down at my desk, and took a break by reading some of my old posts – don’t believe what your $150/hour therapist/psychiatrist might say, even if s/he’s already granted you 3 months of Effexor: nothing soothes the mind like stroking your own ego. Technology [and procrastination] ended up saving my day… What better place to exhibit my new almost award than on a WordPress blog post.
Shit… I almost forgot: Vagina. Hi, Michelle!
Objects on monitor are fresher than they appear.
Haha! Only you would get emails like that
Posted by MissFourEyes | August 21, 2012, 07:05Miss Four Eyes,
My scale tells me similar stories: You’ve almost lost weight today. Better chance tomorrow.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:38Wow! What an honour for you to not get! That really is not something!
Posted by Vanessa Chapman | August 21, 2012, 07:08Vanessa,
It’s hard to bask in the glory of something as faded as an almost award, but leave it to Le Clown to find a way.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:32You have the power to bring out the snark in WordPress as they dangle the “dubious possibility” of FPee-ing on you.
Posted by lameadventures | August 21, 2012, 07:12V,
What an honour, isn’t it? I might just bite on the bone they just threw my way… And post a photo blog this week. I’m just like that.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 07:54I see it as a sort of anti-honor. WP fears your magnificence.
Posted by lameadventures | August 21, 2012, 08:04V,
Le Clown, as an anti-hero. A modern day Portnoy – the goy version. I can live with that.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:23I think it’s time for a recipe or travel post.
Posted by speaker7 | August 21, 2012, 07:23Lol! I did a recipe post. It was totally unoriginal, included stunning photos and did I get pressed?
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 07:26Speaker7,
I do travel to the convenience store regularly. I could write about the 5-minute walk… Take pictures of the bus stop, and that crazy lady who keeps on calling me “clown”.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 07:49It seems not being Freshly Pressed is a hot topic around the WPee-o-sphere.
I’ve managed two posts about it, on separate blogs natch. The only reason I haven’t written five posts, is that the dog doesn’t give a shit, the Land Rover cares even less, and I don’t have a relevant photo for my not-a-photo blog.
I’d add the links to my clouds post and roughseas post but as you can’t be arsed to visit my blogs it feels like too much work
Although I have to say, I have read worse blogs on FP than yours. In fact all the blogs I read from time to time are vastly superior than the trite shite they dish up.
I even went onto the WP forums to suggest they scrap it. I thought that would be guaranteed to get me FPeed, but no.
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 07:25Rough,
Madame Weebles and I put each others to the challenge with the Freshly Pressed posts. Lately, lots of blogs we read were being Fp’d… Some we thought were quite awesome posts, some others, less. And by investigating further, we made the gruesome discovery that a very large portions of these posts were very “beige”, safe…. Which is, to say least, miles away from Madame Weebles’ blog, for example.
And by all means, please add links to your blogs. I do visit Rough Sea in the Med, quite often, actually. But I have little to say about Gibraltar, I guess. But I might be more enticed to comment on your other blogs… Try me. I like you as a writer. And the comment you just left was just perfect.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 07:47I agree, it certainly gave me a laugh…
I will have to read some more of your
friends comments as they are equally
as interesting as the first impression I
have of you Le Clown… Joviality is on
the menu me thinks? Do have a wicked
weekend my friend and keep adding to
your uniqueness, one of these day your
blog will be freshly pressed and greatly
received I shouldn’t wonder…
Androgoth
Posted by Androgoth | August 25, 2012, 08:24http://cloudsmovingin.wordpress.com/2012/08/16/freshly-pressed-oh-the-glory/
and then
http://roughseasinthemed.wordpress.com/2012/08/18/saturday-sarcasm/
But please, not just Rough. Roughseas if you wish to use my diminutive.
Thanks though, that was a pretty fair reply. I don’t comment when I have nowt to say. Roughseas is not particularly controversial, and I try to avoid swearing on there. Most bland/beige/vanilla in fact
Clouds is the more opinionated blog
but as you don’t post about feminism, animal rights, environmentalism, ethical shopping, parental abuse, I’m not sure that would hold a lot for you either. it is the one however, where I happily snark at WP and give my excellent advice about how to blog. This can of course be summed up as: write a decent intro and use short paragraphs. I invariably rehash this from time to time as not everyone has yet got my all-important message.
I haven’t found a decent FP yet. I keel over at the recipe ones, I really do. You can put FP blogs in four or five categories: unoriginal recipes with photos that took hours to stage, how I went skydiving in Cambodia, my extremely personal revelations (no, not like yours) about my wonderful relationship with the person who means more to me than anything else in life, attempts at pretentious philosophical thoughtful garbage, and just sheer crap.
I’ve only read it these last few days because I wrote about it on the blogs. Otherwise I leave well alone for the above reasons.
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 08:05Roughseas,
I think I will then mostly follow your Clouds Moving In blog – I feel I can “contribute” more to the tone and topics…
Le Clown’s “character” will write about feminism often enough, or plainly, he will take a stance on topics he feels close to, without writing a “Huffington” post on the topic, not because he doesn’t find them interesting, but because there are much better writers out there who will do this with more brio, while he can enjoy doing the same in his own way:
1. http://clownonfire.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/extreme-mom/
2. http://clownonfire.wordpress.com/2012/07/16/breastfeeding/
Your posts are much better than most Fp’d posts I have read. Even the bloggers I truly enjoy like Sweet Mother will have their less “spicy” posts pressed when some of their other material are often much more interesting.
I will read you today. So thank you for your links, Roughseas.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:18Without wishing to distract myself from going to the shops [yawn, ok anything to put off going to the shops], I do wish to reply yet again.
Some people read one of my blogs. Some read more, and some read all. They choose what they like and that’s why I separate them. But don’t confuse feminism with parenting. Very different.
In fact Clouds actually started out with the intention of being a feminism blog, but there is only so much you can say really, so other topics gradually crept in. it has a smaller audience than roughseas, and I’m writing about being a vegetarian feminist to meat-eating men
But the exchange of views is interesting, and I appreciate comments from people who don’t have the same mindset as me.
I do blur the boundaries between the two occasionally. Roughseas got a lot of comments about International Womens’ Day (to my surprise), where I talked about womens’ lack of rights worldwide. I’d been asked for a recipe for a fruit chutney I mentioned so I couldn’t resist doing a freshly pressed parody.
Dip in and out
where you choose, and if you enjoy something that’s great. Someone said on one post I made them smile, that’s good enough for me.
Laters LC
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 08:38Roughseas,
I will blur the lines between feminism and parenting, as I do make the difference between both. I have added links to my TIME Magazine reactions, which I think if we want to be fair, parallels both feminism and parenting, may it be just on the cover photo VS the article on extreme moms. I’ve also did pieces on Lisa Brown and Sandra Fluke. I live with a woman who is also extremely vocal on women’s issues and both of us have done our fair share of activism in many different ways.
It is for similar reasons why I created the Black Box Warnings blog, as I didn’t want to induce my posts with Le Clown’s humour, to the point where I’m thinking about signing them as Eric, and not Le Clown. The posts also cater to a different readership.
I have to say, these have been great exchanges, Roughseas. Thanks for this.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:45You summed up the vast majority of FP posts perfectly, Roughseas.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 09:25Thanks MW. Have you read the bit where they say, let us know if you think we have FPeed something off the wall? So when I linked my slightly critical blog post to the daily post, I got a polite ‘we stand by our decisions’ reply. So WTF bother telling them they have made some crap choices? [Note to self, go to shops and leave LC's blog alone].
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 09:31Roughseas,
I’m glad you’re sticking around. Obviously, and as per the WP email that was sent yesterday, they are watching my blog, and Madame Weebles’ blog. I’m hoping they might react, or comment, or jump in… I’ve been wondering about WordPress’ brand lately. As a blogging interface, they have the strongest one, in my opinion, Tumblr being second. But by freshly pressing only the “generically polite” blogs, they will end up being branded as the Vanilla of all blog platforms, which is a shame, because some of the best writers are on this platform, and they are far from being “beige”.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:37I am not sticking around. Go away. I AM going to the shops. Finally. And don’t think I believe that email was genuine for one minute. * Storms off it roughseas huff *
Posted by roughseasinthemed | August 21, 2012, 09:44Roughseas,
It is indeed a genuine email, that I can assure you. I’ve just branded it to the look and feel of my blog.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:45… and for the record, I’m not referring to cursing when I am referring to the non-vanilla posts, although I do not condemn cursing, and a Fp’d post with a few “fuck” could easily have a warning attached to it for the potential readers…
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:44Clown dear,
One of the first FP’ed posts I read in fact contained more profanity than yours, with, I might add, a much trashier level of diction. (Despite your efforts, you know as well as I that your diction is pretty high. Damn intelligence creeping in and all.) That FP post was, to be sure, a post on parenting. But still. They lie.
(Love,)
Owl
Posted by owl | August 22, 2012, 13:21Owl,
I had read a few edgier FP’d post myself in the past… The potty mouthed-posts are less and less chosen, and there’s something to be said about that.
I wouldn’t go as far as saying they are lying. I do think they have a brand which they are trying to maintain, and this email was their way of saying: “we want to, just give us one that we can work with”… but I wouldn’t want it to be a post that is not of Le Clown’s nature, with or without cursing.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 13:29That is a huge honor that you’ve not received! Looks great on your blog! How ever will you celebrate?
Posted by Sophy | August 21, 2012, 08:39Sophy,
Let’s see if baby #3 will be on the way…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 08:48Bahaha! You just made me spill coffee on my Wacom for laughing so hard. XD
Posted by Sophy | August 21, 2012, 08:50Obviously, you’re being watched, Le Clown. Your freak flag is waving and people are taking notice. Walk proudly my friend and you will soon be at the top of Freaky Freshly Pressed. They should do that — Freaky Freshly Pressed. You would be King and I mean that with the utmost (is that a word?) respect, friend. You wouldn’t just be FP’d, you’d be FFP’d. xxoo
Posted by Brigitte | August 21, 2012, 09:16Brigitte,
I can take freak – I know Andy Kaufman – which is one of my humour mentors – was often called a freak. I also do weird well. This email received yesterday, was the perfect honour for Le Clown. It means WordPress acknowledges the quality of my posts, but at the same time, understands that my brand of creativity may not cater to the general public, which I am also very comfortable with.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:30I really agree with you, Brigitte. I think WP should do a separate category – Freaky Freshly Pressed! I would go there first and you and Weebs should get the first joint-honors. Nice try, though, you guys. Maybe instead of the Canadica website, we should start another thread – “Not Yet Ready for Freshly Pressed Bloggers.” What do ya think?
Posted by Cathy Ulrich | August 21, 2012, 09:53Cathy,
Freshly Pressed can be a great point of entry for new comers. It should be diversified. Girppy last week used the term: Indie. Why not? The Indie Pressed. Or my wife this morning stated: Freshly Pressed On The Edge. We wouldn’t want WordPress to become the Martha Stewart of all blog platforms now, would we?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 10:31You realize you have me to thank for WP sending that email to you, Le Clown. I expect a sizeable commission when you get FP’d. Plus royalties.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 09:23Madame Weebles,
I see it like this: If and when I get Fp’d, I’m bringing you with me.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:24If WP ever does a two-for-one FP special, then we’re in for sure.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 09:29I feel the rejection IS your award! You and Weebles have maintained your blogging integrity and reputation for, as Brigitte suggests, flying your freak flag. Should you conform and play nice, I have no doubt that a Freshly Pressed award awaits you. Is that what you really want? Be careful what you wish for, Le Clown.
Posted by a gripping life | August 21, 2012, 09:30Grippy,
You have hit the nail on the head with this comment, and I’m not referring to my magnificent head. I will write my fair share of posts which will have less Le Clown in them, like the one I wrote when I came back from Nova Scotia. But I will not change my tone, nor essence to be Fp’d. If I ever get Fp’d, I will be happy, I won’t lie about this. But it will be for a post that is Le Clown in essence.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 09:32Yes! You have the ability to make people feel things with both your killer sense of humor, your unique observations and your passion for life. Don’t lose that. I want to connect with you, Le Clown/Eric the human being, not something that you’ve cooked up to get noticed. If it happens, it’s yours, if it doesn’t you’ve maintained your integrity and that’s priceless.
Posted by a gripping life | August 21, 2012, 09:59tee hee… magnificent head.
Posted by a gripping life | August 21, 2012, 10:00*snicker*
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 12:08Le Clown,
Please keep being the naughty and interesting person you are. You are a clown after my own heart. Something weird happened to misslisted the other day. My stats kept rising and rising all day long (not that I check them compulsively). My pathetic high day of 152 views was blown out of the water by 9:30 AM. “What can be happening?” I thought to myself. “Have I finally received the attention I have been craving and been Freshly Pressed”. Strangely my stats ran up all day to a whopping 1110 views. After a while, I was able to ascertain that it was all due to one image of Julia Child I had infringingly posted on an old blog I wrote about Julia Child as inspiration for a yoga teacher. While I got NO COMMENTS and NO NEW SUBSCRIBERS as a result of this weird situation, I did get a little squirt of dopamine every time I opened my stats page (which was hundreds of times) , and I was breifly the happiest person on the face of the earth as a result of this incredible situation.
your pal and apparent member of your virtual readership-harem, misslisted
Posted by misslisted | August 21, 2012, 10:40MissListed,
Funny how that little orange blinking light will get the dopamine/serotonin spew… I do not have any desire to change Le Clown’s voice. I have another blog which satisfies the need to write something more conventional, on a topic that is dear to me (my son’s ADD while being on Concerta), but A Clown on Fire will remain a scrapbook of basically anything that I will want to put out there, with different levels of success.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 10:56I am intimately familiar with Concerta.
Posted by misslisted | August 21, 2012, 12:28I will say that I only got FP’d after you told me to “fuck ‘em”. So, please, let’s all say it together now…………..FUCK ‘EM. (insert winky smiley emoticon here)
Posted by Fish Out of Water | August 21, 2012, 10:45Fish,
I like to use VAGINA. Personally. I mean, filthy disgusting, right?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 11:14If WordPress is watching this thread — and they very likely are — maybe they should have a second variation of Freshly Pressed — something off the mainstream that gives edgier writers their due? Of course, this could launch a whole other kind of competition with people feeling that one shoutout is inferior to the other.
Posted by lameadventures | August 21, 2012, 10:55V,
I couldn’t agree more. Unless, and it could be their marketing strategy, they’re trying to cater to a wider and general public as their first mandate… A blogging platform from my experience as a web and social media strategist has not been defined so far by its content. If I compare Tumblr and WordPress, I will find similar bloggers, edgy and mainstream ones… Equal in quality, and in duds. What WordPress offers is a strong and powerful CMS (content management system), which allows us bloggers to create blog posts with more latitude, and more options. When I speak with my colleagues in Montreal, we almost all agree: WordPress is the tool to use. My fear is that if the only blogs that are FPd or suggested are the Martha Stewarts of the crop, it will start dissuading the more “fringe” writers, for a lack of better term. I mean, would you want to write for the “Oprah Magazine”? I sure wouldn’t.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 11:10Why WordPress hasn’t done this already is beyond me. They’ve failed to realize that there is a large audience waiting to have someone handpick edgier stuff to read. Don’t get me wrong, I love looking at someone’s vacation pictures, but I can only do that so many times before I start craving a little snark. Stop making me do all the work WP!
The truth is, WP is not my go-to place to read my funnies unless it’s people I’ve subscribed to through accidental discovery. If WP actually helped a sister out, I’d come here way more often.
I’ll never ever EVER going to be freshly pressed, and I’m actually totally fine with that. I choose to “write with bite” (copyright J&T) and my readers seem to like that. I’m not messing with that formula. However, it does bother me when I read someone else’s work, someone I think is funny and talented, and I realize they’ll never get the recognition they deserve. They’re going to get passed up so that WP can feature ANOTHER recipe.
Posted by Jen and Tonic | August 21, 2012, 13:55Jen,
You’re one of the few that I will read without wasting a minute when you publish a post. You write with bite, indeed. And out of curiosity, where do you go when you want to read something funny, other than on my magnificent blog, of course?
I was exchanging on the topic with Madame Weebles, and I was telling her that with time, some blogs might just become obsolete in their pool of possibilities. I mean, I could write a more vanilla post, which could be pressed, but readers who would browse through my older posts would see what Le Clown is all about… I’m wondering if that is also a factor?
And for the record, it’s not about being Freshly Pressed no matter what… If for recognition of the talent that it is out there on WP, not necessarily the edgier ones, but the offbeat writers (Dotty, David Dixon, you, Smaktakula – has he ever been Fp’d?) and others.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 14:03I have bookmarked blogs, use StumbleUpon, The Onion, and Fark. Admittedly, Fark collects bizarre news stories so it doesn’t fit the blog theme. I think I’d actually get away from using these other sites if I could more easily find blogs of my taste on WP. It is just such a time suck.
Also, I agree that “edgier” was the wrong word to use there.
Posted by Jen and Tonic | August 21, 2012, 18:11i disagree, jen. i totally think you could get fp’d. i truly do. sm
Posted by sweetmother | August 21, 2012, 14:06I think if I softened up on some of the imagery I use, maybe I could, but that wouldn’t be very Jen & Tonic of me
Posted by Jen and Tonic | August 21, 2012, 18:12I think they are trying to cater to “a wider and general public as their first mandate” as illustrated by the vast majority of PG-rated posts they FPee, but being the biggest and, for now, the best, they can afford to be expansive with what blogs they showcase. Why must they limit it to the more mainstream-type post? They can have it both ways if they so choose if they highlight the mainstream posts on FPee and the edgier ones on, I dunno, Edge Pee. If not, another blogging platform could start that targets edgier bloggers. Who has a MySpace account anymore? (Of course this statement is from someone that loathes FB and hardly ever goes there.)
Posted by lameadventures | August 21, 2012, 11:37Ha, FPee. I like this idea, V. Because by catering to the “wider and general public,” they’re making it supremely bland, overall. Every so often you get a fantastic post, from the likes of you, Brigitte, Sweet Mother, Fish, and a bunch of others, but those are like little gems in a bucket of chum.
A more Edgy FPee type of platform would alleviate this problem. And it would give props to all kinds of bloggers who have content that doesn’t neatly fit the general public’s tastes and sensibilities. LIke bloggers with “mature” content, or people who are prone to swearing (like me), or people who have edgy, off-beat stuff (like Le Clown).
Personally, my next post about FP is just going to be “Freshly Press THIS” with a photo of my middle finger. At least Le Clown got an email. I got bupkes.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 12:15Edgy FPee would be the perfect name for this offshoot. WordPress might not want to mess with their brand, so they’ll continue to FP the usual lightweight fare. This is probably why I seldom look at what’s been FPeed. If I want to be bored I’d go to church.
Posted by lameadventures | August 21, 2012, 12:28That last sentence was spot-on, V.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 12:35I really like this idea. I have to admit that I don’t care much to be FPeed because I know I don’t write things that they are looking for, but I have seen some awesome, edgy and/or humorous posts from great writers who deserve a chance. One of them will me Madame Weebles’ middle finger, for sure.
Posted by La La | August 21, 2012, 13:11I’m seriously considering posting that, La La. I mean, they send Le Clown an email at my email address to tell me that they may consider a Le Clown post in the future, but no mention of Madame Weebles aside from the greeting?? Fuck that noise, they’re getting my middle finger.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 15:35Weebs,
Come on, it was addressed to both of us, and it was sent to you because I wrote on your blog. They had you in mind too. Fuck the technicalities.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 16:14It’s totally fine, this was mock outrage—I do think the email was mainly in regard to you, which is totally fine. I just enjoy being petty. Because I do it so well.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 16:20‘little gems in a bucket of chum’ —- ooooooh, lawd, this sentence should be freshly pressed all on its own. loved.
Posted by sweetmother | August 21, 2012, 14:07Oh bless you, Momma.
Posted by Madame Weebles | August 21, 2012, 15:35I would say that email exceeds the joy of Freshly Pressed, given its rarity. Like a golden ticket, hold onto it tightly, Le Clown. Others may want to snatch it.
Posted by Carrie Rubin | August 21, 2012, 11:47Carrie,
Thank you. I took the liberty of rebranding it as I hate the white background of an email. But I am of the same opinion: it is an award in itself.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 11:48I’m in total agreement with this! The fact that a real human being wrote an e-mail to you (and a fairly cool one at that) is rarer than being FPed.
Posted by Jen and Tonic | August 21, 2012, 13:24Congratulations. Now let the dancing and debauchery ensue!
Posted by rebecca2000 | August 21, 2012, 12:42I think you got that email because of that sassy picture of you sitting in the grass. Someone has a secret crush on you.
Posted by La La | August 21, 2012, 13:13La La,
That picture is all about the hair on my head.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 13:32rigghhhhttt, and the homeless guy thought I was Dolly Parton b/c of my hair.
Only you M. Le Clown, could get WP to email you about what they are not going to do with your blog. Seulement toi!
Posted by Maggie O'C | August 21, 2012, 13:45Maggie,
It’s pretty awesome, isn’t it? I think I should make a post dedicated to Michelle.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 13:47you realize, you may be one of the ONLY people to ever receive an email like that. write something for the masses, they’re dying to “press” you. so, give ‘em what they want. much love, sm
Posted by sweetmother | August 21, 2012, 14:03SM,
In my head, Michelle and I are best friends. And she’s telling me: Don’t do it… Don’t do it…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 14:22and i just read some of the above comments. i don’t think she’s asking you to change your tone. i think she’s asking for something the masses can read. get off your high horse about it and write it! you have the power to do so without losing any of your ‘clownieness’. this is know. the piece about your dad, is one such piece. write another one like that-ish… xoxo, sm
Posted by sweetmother | August 21, 2012, 14:05SM,
It’s not being on a high horse… It’s writing what comes out of that silly brain of mine. You know, the piece on my dad came out because of the circumstances of the moment. I didn’t order it… Yes, I’m one of those who thinks inspiration is a fucktard who will not pop out when you want it to – actually, let me rephrase that… When you wrote your Reggie piece on me, you made it clear: Le Clown did write about this, and write about that, it’s hard to pinpoint Le Clown. Well that’s exactly how my inspiration pops by, with different topics/ideas which I just jump on when it comes…Does it make sense?
This being said, love Michelle’s email. Oh. And I won’t write for the mass for the sake of writing for the mass. No emoticon inserted.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 14:11That is moderately amusing. I think I like that story wrangler.
Posted by Christine | August 21, 2012, 14:11Christine,
What is moderately amusing? The post, or the email? My post was just OK, methinks. The email, pretty damn funny and well written, methinks. The comments it is generating, damn magnificent.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 14:14The email. And I was underexaggerating for effect. It was effing hilarious.
Posted by Christine | August 21, 2012, 14:17Christine,
You’ve succeeded!! It’s pretty special, right? I will keep it with my university diploma. My dad would be so proud…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 14:19If I got Not Freshly Pressed, I would put it up on the wall next to my No Pulitzer Prize, my Un Noble Peace Prize and my Noscar (= No Oscar).
Posted by Curmudgeon-at-Large | August 21, 2012, 15:00CaL,
I disagree with your comment. Seems appropriate.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 16:30Ha. That’s awesome. I hope Michelle works for a credit card company also because I’d love to get an email that says:
Attention, Calahan. You have not been chosen to be pre-approved for a $3000 limit on a new credit card. We’ll keep checking back with you, though.
Big fans, by the way
Corporate Overlord’s Assistant
Posted by calahan | August 21, 2012, 15:14Le Calahan,
You pretty much summed it up.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 16:31That is so much better than actually being freshly pressed that I don’t even know what to say. At least they have noticed your magnificence. It’s really big. I guess it would have been hard for them to not see it. Like that time in the seventh grade when you had to give a presentation in front of the whole class and… wait, that was me… was I really wearing spandex to middle school? I think my memories are blurring…
Posted by asoulwalker | August 21, 2012, 15:48A Soul Walker,
It was purple spandex, right?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 16:31Of course… and maybe I will add you on facebook for real and you can see an “exercise video” demonstrating my purple-tighted prowess.
Posted by asoulwalker | August 21, 2012, 16:33A Soul Walker,
By all means!
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 21, 2012, 16:34It appears there is nothing you cannot do, so I am going to put in my requests for things I want done.
1. Americans to stop being stupid
2. Nude beaches in every city
3. The ability to fly without growing wings
Posted by nevercontrary | August 21, 2012, 21:12NC,
I could make you fly, but you’re American, and I can’t make an American fly. And that made no sense at all.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 08:58Why can’t you make American’s fly? What is my soul isn’t american?
Posted by nevercontrary | August 22, 2012, 20:54NC,
You’re right. You’re above the stupidity that weighs down an American, and can’t make him/her lift off. I can work with you.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 23, 2012, 07:53Phew that’s a relief.
Posted by nevercontrary | August 23, 2012, 19:04Hahahaha, awesome
.
Posted by No Blog Intended | August 22, 2012, 05:27Jules,
I don’t want to alarm you, but your eye is pretty red on that avatar of yours…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 08:57Dear Clown, I’ve got no clue at all why you call me Jules, but okay. I got that eye because of too much blogging. So beware.
Best regards, Jules
Posted by No Blog Intended | August 22, 2012, 09:54Jules,
Jules. Jules. Jules. Jules.
Le Jules
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 09:55I am jealous of your now officially recognized unfreshly pressed status being officially recognized by the freshly pressed powers that lurk. Oh to be so monitored and observed by those invisible stalkers of ethereal words…my only hope is they will read the comments and glance at my pages. Of course it will be on the day I post something like “I gots nothing to say to day anyway – but hey I said it so there!”
Posted by merlinspielen | August 22, 2012, 10:17Merlin,
Funny enough, since I’ve been granted this high non-honour, I’ve been losing my gray hair, for the brown shades of my youth.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 12:55Close . . . but no cigar.
Posted by robincoyle | August 22, 2012, 13:23Robin,
This was better than a cigar. to Le Clown, this is like a good glass of port. But I am a recovering alcoholic, so I can’t drink it.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 22, 2012, 13:30I’ll drink it for you.
Posted by robincoyle | August 22, 2012, 17:40Good God! How’d I miss this one? Good job!
Posted by Sword-chinned bitch | August 22, 2012, 20:29Auntie Sandee,
Did you finally take the blue pill?
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 23, 2012, 07:58Oh! That’s why this damn thing won’t go down.
Posted by Sword-chinned bitch | August 24, 2012, 12:22I am really torn about it. On the one hand, I want to be pressed, because you get all those views and stuff. On the other hand, I’ve been reviewing 50 shades and this absolutely requires bad words all over the place. I write about a lot of other topics, so maybe they’ll find one of those and ignore the naughty ones. You think? On the other hand . . . wait I ran out of hands . . . anyway there are a lot of people who haven’t been pressed who are fun, so it’s somewhat entertaining to be in the non-pressed camp as well. This post made no sense. I think.
Posted by aliceatwonderland | August 23, 2012, 14:23Alice,
Welcome on A Clown on Fire! “This post made no sense”, you obviously referred to your comment with the mention of a three-hand monster, right? As such monsters do not exist, but in American politics… But beside 3 hands, the American politician monsters have gooey eyes and slick hair, long snaky tongues, and feast on fried hamburgers…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 23, 2012, 14:29It all makes sense now. To think I used to be scared of clowns.
Posted by aliceatwonderland | August 23, 2012, 14:34Alice,
Don’t be afraid of clowns… It’s small Bichon Frisé you should be scared shitless of…
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 23, 2012, 14:36Speaking of cursing… I finally used a mild curse word on my blog, assuming I had no chance of ever being fresh-pressed anyway. And I was fresh-pressed with it right there on the front page! I think WordPress secretly likes it when we curse.
Just something to keep in mind when you’re writing your next fucking post. Also, I’ve decided Le Clowne is right, and that all post titles should be as long as fucking possible.
Posted by Love & Lunchmeat | August 23, 2012, 14:34L&L,
Fuck yeah. Right? Fuckin’ A!
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 23, 2012, 14:35I am green with almost envy. You are my almost hero. You could be my real hero someday, but not today.
Posted by uniqueweirdness | August 24, 2012, 12:43Unique Weirdness,
I’m with you on that. I haven’t been able to look myself in the mirror since that email. I have to look myself in a mirror that reflects in the main mirror to gaze upon my clownliness.
Le Clown
Posted by Le Clown | August 24, 2012, 12:46Soon to be your *Royal* clownliness at this rate. *swoon* Will you also run around Vegas nekkie and show your royal butt like the other royal clown?
Posted by uniqueweirdness | August 24, 2012, 12:49Wow, I wonder if they send those emails to anyone else. “You didn’t get freshly pressed, but here’s our email as an honorable mention. Unfortunately, you’re not G-rated enough for being freshly pressed for real.” Lol.
Most of the freshly pressed posts I’ve deigned to click on have been terrible. I’ve seen a few more decent ones lately, but also a few more terrible ones, too.
Posted by Angel Fractured | August 25, 2012, 13:49Well at least I know a bit more about what “Freshly Pressed” is now! That’s quite and honor you almost but didn’t receive1
Posted by jiltaroo | August 29, 2012, 21:03